This is another very important point which PUAs fail to mention and how PUA fills your head up with crap and makes you a social robot. This is a complete departure from the point which PUAs make that you can seduce any woman, you can get any girl on the first date etc.
Meeting women is heavily dependent on your local environment. I have realized this very explicitly because I have traveled a lot in life and have lived in many different countries. In some environments, you can approach a girl on the street, text her to meet you for a drink, she will come with you, and you can fuck her the same night. In more conservative environments, you have to approach her through a friend or very casually, text her a bit, talk on the phone for a bit, then go for a low key date, maybe then for drinks and maybe then have sex. This whole thing might play out over many weeks.
PUA made me believe that any girl can be seduced on the first date and that if she refuses, she is probably playing games with you. Not that she is super conscious herself and just not so confident. It made me believe that if i don't act super "alpha" or player-ish, she will meet another player dude who she will fuck immediately. That all girls are sluts and constantly fuck "alpha dudes".
The reality is more like so many women are constantly complaining that they never meet any decent guy forget a super well calibrated player, many girls just won't have sex outside relationships, some have gone many months and maybe more without sex, that they are much more conscious and unsure than you are, that many girls are so sensitive that if you tease them too much you will make them think of you as huge asshole (cocky funny anyone?) etc.
So even if you read some well intentioned advice from some PUA dude who says that you should move faster, its fucking you up mentally because some girls are just not comfortable with high speed. If a girl meets you regularly for dates, talks to you on phone, does not play games, and you have clearly shown sexual intentions, then it is a matter of time more than anything else.
Point is local environment is very important. So I believe the best one can do is find out a guy who is similar to you in core personality traits and who is very good with women, and hang out with him. I know this is maybe not easy to find for most guys, but this is probably the best you can do.
Speaking for myself, this is the most significant point you have made so far. All of your blog is of a high quality, by the way. I hate to say it, but I've lost count of the number of potentially great girlfriends I have ruined things with because I couldn't stop trying to think of the 'fast lay'. I just acted like some super horny, hypertense dick who had no respect for the fact that the woman in question needed time to get to know me. Ho hum, at least I figured it out before old age comes and steals me away from the women, ha ha!
ReplyDeleteGlad you found it useful. It's funny how some point which I never thought would be so important, is the one which people end up liking the most! :)
Deletethe 3 date rule before sex STILL applies for a large number of girls/women
ReplyDeleteone of the most bizarre aspects of pua myth is that they say girls are gagging for sex and all are some latent cum guzzling gang bang bitch (available only if you know the secret routine or technique of course)---they aint - its just biologically improbable and anyone with some experience of women just simply knows that they aint as interested in sex as often as men (which is why we have porn, prostitution and pua)
ime if you are seeing a girl regularly and things are PROGRESSING than thats good - of course you can get stuck on a plateau where the girl is simply not interested in sex with you but likes your company---always escalate heavy on a 2nd date as it will filter out girls who are simply meeting you for free rides, entertainment but NOT sex -- BUT of course NO girl has ever taken advantage of a guys sexual interest