After high school, I went to one of the best colleges of my country. The time spent here is what I think fucked me up the most. Before this, I always thought girls liked me, though I did not know why. In my school, people although extremely intelligent, were complete social retards. It was a big deal if you were comfortable talking to women, if you had a serious girlfriend in school - you were thought of as a rockstar. If she was very cute, well then you are a creature from another planet.
The ratio in my college was totally fucked up. Even the few girls who were there were extremely ugly and given the ratio they thought themselves to be like gods gifts on earth. Also, it was not a university which had other softer disciplines as well, so we were sort of restricted to be within our college. The four years spent here without women and with social retards, made me a social retard as well.
By the time I graduated, although it set me up very nicely in terms of my career, I thought I would never get a girl, having a girlfriend is like this super elite achievement, I am ugly, no girl wants to date a guy like me etc. I had also read a few PUA books like DavidD and Mystery in the final year of my undergrad and that reinforced these beliefs even further. If you had to do so much to have sex with a girl, clearly its very tough and no wonder I will never be able to do it.
There were plenty of instances which should convinced me otherwise. I went two summers for paid internships to Europe and US and there LOTS and LOTS of women wanted to hook up with me. Europe is where I lost my virginity. Its a miracle it actually happened. I was at a train station trying to book my ticket but was having trouble with the ticket lady because she just refused to speak any English. A local girl helped me out, I said thank you and got going. Then the same girl appeared in my cabin in the subway. We started talking. When she was getting off, I somehow mustered up the courage to ask her for a coffee. We had coffee, then we just took a walk. She took me to a park where everyone was making out. We then made out and later had sex. To be honest, this was extremely lucky because she practically did all the work. She became my first girlfriend. Overall, she was the only girl I got during college. No one else.
Telling stories from my time in US almost embarrassing. Overall, no girls from my time in US but lots of opportunities where I should have got some. At a dance lesson, there was a mexican girl who would smile at me from across the room, look into my eyes while dancing, put her hands around my neck and others would frequently tell us that we're like this cute couple. I thought it was all because I was a good dancer and she was being nice! Another girl who used to stay in opposite direction from my place, walked all the way drunk from a dance party to my place and we stood at the door of my place and I was thinking why is she still here!
Another girl at the dance party would awkwardly step on my shoes, mistakenly put her arms around my neck, tell me I am such a good dancer, drag me on to the floor, rub her ass against my crotch and I still did not do anything about it.
You get the point. I was just a clueless idiot. There were lots of such women. I think all this too would happen to anyone if you met are decent looking, dress reasonably and met enough girls in a RELAXED and trustworthy environment. Cold approach can be very hostile at times. But if you got a good social group or frequently went to dance parties, all this would happen to most people to varying degrees.
The ratio in my college was totally fucked up. Even the few girls who were there were extremely ugly and given the ratio they thought themselves to be like gods gifts on earth. Also, it was not a university which had other softer disciplines as well, so we were sort of restricted to be within our college. The four years spent here without women and with social retards, made me a social retard as well.
By the time I graduated, although it set me up very nicely in terms of my career, I thought I would never get a girl, having a girlfriend is like this super elite achievement, I am ugly, no girl wants to date a guy like me etc. I had also read a few PUA books like DavidD and Mystery in the final year of my undergrad and that reinforced these beliefs even further. If you had to do so much to have sex with a girl, clearly its very tough and no wonder I will never be able to do it.
There were plenty of instances which should convinced me otherwise. I went two summers for paid internships to Europe and US and there LOTS and LOTS of women wanted to hook up with me. Europe is where I lost my virginity. Its a miracle it actually happened. I was at a train station trying to book my ticket but was having trouble with the ticket lady because she just refused to speak any English. A local girl helped me out, I said thank you and got going. Then the same girl appeared in my cabin in the subway. We started talking. When she was getting off, I somehow mustered up the courage to ask her for a coffee. We had coffee, then we just took a walk. She took me to a park where everyone was making out. We then made out and later had sex. To be honest, this was extremely lucky because she practically did all the work. She became my first girlfriend. Overall, she was the only girl I got during college. No one else.
Telling stories from my time in US almost embarrassing. Overall, no girls from my time in US but lots of opportunities where I should have got some. At a dance lesson, there was a mexican girl who would smile at me from across the room, look into my eyes while dancing, put her hands around my neck and others would frequently tell us that we're like this cute couple. I thought it was all because I was a good dancer and she was being nice! Another girl who used to stay in opposite direction from my place, walked all the way drunk from a dance party to my place and we stood at the door of my place and I was thinking why is she still here!
Another girl at the dance party would awkwardly step on my shoes, mistakenly put her arms around my neck, tell me I am such a good dancer, drag me on to the floor, rub her ass against my crotch and I still did not do anything about it.
You get the point. I was just a clueless idiot. There were lots of such women. I think all this too would happen to anyone if you met are decent looking, dress reasonably and met enough girls in a RELAXED and trustworthy environment. Cold approach can be very hostile at times. But if you got a good social group or frequently went to dance parties, all this would happen to most people to varying degrees.
Hmmm! You must have been from the Indian Institutes of Technology
ReplyDeleteNice background. my teen years was the same... but I was A LOT worst than you.. first date I ever had was when I was 21 first that I held hands with a girl was 21 (different girl) it was a load of my friends and this red head really liked me but I was too stupid to do anything. Trust me I was bad!!!!!! got into pickup in my mid 20's first girl I ever dated became my gf... got into another one 3 months later... was caught cheating... now starting again...
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