The next night we started in similar fashion. Two of us. Went over the previous night with the two of them. More of you're so money bro. The two of us went out and task was that before we went back to the lounge, we had to collect numbers from chicks and invite girls back to the lounge. We roamed around, approached a few girls and somehow ended up in this laid back bar. I felt awesome and alive the moment I stepped in there. The crowd was very international, I was probably younger and better dressed than a lot of guys there, people were less snobbish and it generally felt awesome. I did amazingly well there. The other guy bombed there. He did well the other night in the upscale lounge. But this was a completely different environment. (as a side note, I almost always do well there. Every night I have gone there, I have almost always done well).
I went back to the coach dudes. Told them about it. They could not believe I did so well. A couple of girls even showed up later to the lounge. Asked about this venue phenomenon. They said, yeah this lounge place is "tougher" and that I needed to step my game up for that. This was a really stupid thing to say. (I have realized that as guys, we usually don't like hearing that xyz thing is harder or beyond our reach. So whenever someone says a statement like that, you implicitly tell yourself that I am going to crack this). Plus, I sort of respected these guys so I started assuming that game is this linear thing where you keep improving ad-infinitum.
Went again to this lounge place. I bombed again. When I asked for advice, they said you need to be more "playful". No other concrete advice. I forgot to add one thing to the previous night. One of the two coaches got drunk and took a girl home. Definitely not what I paid him to do. This night I managed to isolate a girl but wanted to kiss her to I sort of lunged across. It was not smooth, and the girl left. Something similar happened with the other 2 girls from earlier in the night who showed up at the lounge.
When I asked these guys about how could I make it more smooth, they said, don't worry, keep doing it. It will automatically become more smooth over a period of time! There were lots of other red flags as well which I should have noticed. When I told these guys earlier that I feel white guys going to places like Thailand and Philippines get laid easily, they said no its not true. Its about personality and game. Then I asked if my accent, race, nationality etc. could be a potential problem. They said just own it. It's all in your head. if you don't care, the girls don't care.
There were lots of other red flags as well. No specific advice, one-size-fits-all methodology. Then they mentioned that they went out every night for almost 3 years. I now have no clue what kind of guys do such a thing. Anyway.
Next day we did some street game. I think this is what hurt me the most. Not realizing how fundamentally flawed blindly approaching girls on the street really is, we went to do it. I was seduced by the idea that not every girl goes to bars but they have to go about their daily chores. They kept harping about how awesome street game really is.
After the bootcamp, I went out and probably did 70-80 street approaches. I got probably more than 25 numbers. All flakes. Every single one of them. Asked them about it. They said - keep doing the same and one day it will all be easier! This was the final nail in the coffin.
Hilarious. White guys kill it in Thailand and Phillipines, that is a statistical fact. They're denying reality, by definition making them delusional.
ReplyDeleteSame story with me and street game. On to the next post...
"When I asked these guys about how could I make it more smooth, they said, don't worry, keep doing it. It will automatically become more smooth over a period of time!" GOOD ADVICE
ReplyDeleteTo answer your specific question, there are quite a few simple things to tell an absolute newbie which is better than to say nothing, stuff which may seen very obvious to an experienced guy - for instance, tell him to grab her hand first, maybe move in close and put your hands around her waist, maybe kiss her on her cheeks first etc.
DeleteAlso, if the person isn't really going to give any specific advice, what justifies $1000+ price tag? (I agree, there is very little advice to give, and no way in hell does that justify a $1000+ price tag. Sleazy gives out all that is needed in $7 book)
Something which I don't get more generally is why do you bother defending PUAs, especially in light of this blog? I think that after reading this blog, it shouldn't even be open to question that all PUAs are crap.