Tuesday, 20 March 2012

Rejection doesn't matter - Part 1

I want to talk about this attitude today - rejection doesn't matter. Isn't this the very fucking basis of this PUA community? I want to talk a bit more about this attitude and how this potentially leads to extremely anti-social behavior, is literally the core reason why PUA is like a such a big cult, why this industry is such a big scam and why it will continue to be until this is thought over in a bit more detail.

So say an average guy gets into this industry. He hasn't been very successful with women in his life. One huge reason is that he likely cares way too much about what others think. So he is told, rejection doesn't matter. So far so good. He goes out, tries some stupid lines, techniques and what not, and gets rejected a bunch of times. He thinks something is not right. His coach tells him, dude rejection does not matter, you are improving, baby steps at a time. You couldn't approach earlier, now you can. Keep going. Freshly inspired, keeps going, same story. Rejected a bunch of times.

Here is where it starts to get a bit shady. The point is, consistently being rejected is a sign that something is not working. Something needs to change. Here, the PUA gurus say, dude rejection doesn't matter. You are improving. Others don't understand what we are doing here. Cold approach is fucking hard. He keeps going. Not realizing how anti-social and mentally fucked up he is getting, he keeps going. The other fucked up dudes who can relate to his position, only help to amplify this problem. Statements like these then slowly isolate him from normal society, attach him to other similarly fucked up people and just keep amplifying this cult like problem. Since he thinks others in normal society are totally stupid, can't understand what he is doing, he only listens to others who are doing this.

Problem is, they are too fucked up themselves so of course, they can't talk straight. When these fucked up dudes talk amongst each other, no one really admits how no one is really getting laid. No one talks about how they too have been doubting if this PUA journey is really worth it. Someone might even be very bullish on PUA till that point. All these people, think this is supposed to be really hard, you have keep another brother going, so they spur him on instead of admitting the truth to themselves and others. So the problem just keeps on worsening.

You see the point? How these small statements and attitudes when overused amplify the cult like feeling so much and prevents objectivity from showing you the light? In the follow up article I actually want to talk about the other side of the problem (it is much much worse) and how when coaches use a similar attitude, the industry as a whole goes downhill and becomes such a scam.


  1. Indeed. It fucks up their mental state and makes them slaves to the PUA industry under he guise of self improvement (which is largely bullshit). Ahh this brings back so many bad memories I have experienced. I'll be going to a uni soon, hopefully things are better there.

  2. These PUA dudes are vultures -- all these youtube accounts they have -- they just give you common sense advice and motivation an occassionally some great insight but then all of a sudden youre lured into buying 500 dollar packages of bullshit --

  3. I'm looking into rejection in context of sales now and it's kind of similar - it's cool to be able to process indefinite amounts of rejection but if it is the only result than probably something can be improved